is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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