the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
