WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
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