Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize