playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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