i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
