You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
