what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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