oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
