I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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