so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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