sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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