just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
