would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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