I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize