Its about making memories worth repressing
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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