also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
The best revenge is premature balding
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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