Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
