That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
