he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
