I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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