he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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