There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
