i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
