that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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