I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize