woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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