everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
You took a bar mat shot.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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