I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
