No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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