? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
