i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize