How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
