A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
