i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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