me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize