That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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