Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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