Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
