Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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