Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
