I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize