Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
