Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
