they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize