his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
