omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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