Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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