On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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