Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize