We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
